I read a quote the other day & it’s been lingering in my mind ever since.
Would you do all the things you normally do if you knew nobody was watching? When was the last time you did something good for yourself or somebody else, without anyone knowing about it & felt a genuine sense of accomplishment?
It’s human nature for us to expect & wait for people to praise us for the things we do. That’s how we add value & meaning to what we do. How will others perceive it? What will they think?
The thing we don’t realize is that PERCEPTION IS RELATIVE & SUBJECTIVE.
Who are you seeking that recognition, value & meaning from? Why are you seeking it? Most likely because you want others to see you in a positive light & there’s NOTHING wrong with wanting to be perceived positively & to be a good person. But before seeking that positive perception from others, seek it from & for yourself.
The danger in this tendency is when we let that praise become the PURPOSE, REASON & DRIVE for what we do. You should do good because you want to & for yourself & not to impress others or to compete with them.
Keep your intentions sincere. Find happiness in knowing that the things you’re doing from the goodness of your heart are done so you can be content with yourself & not because you’re seeking approval or contentment from others.
The people who are meant to be & stay in your life will see how truly good you are without you having to go out of your way to prove yourself to them.
I spent a lot of my life seeking approval from others for the way I looked, how I performed in school/work & how strong I appeared on the outside (even though I was hurting inside).
Recovery taught me to be vulnerable & to stop doing good, looking good & appearing strong to satisfy others. I learned that doing good for others means nothing if I don’t do good for myself, that what matters most is pursuing a lifestyle where I FEEL good & lastly, it taught me that it’s okay not to be okay. I don’t always need to look strong & courageous if that’s not a true reflection of how I am feeling.
True happiness is when you seek approval from nobody else but yourself & when you find contentment in just that.