“Sometimes, you have to be your own hero”
Making the decision to recover from my eating disorder on my own was probably one of the toughest ones I ever made. And to be honest, when I first made that decision, I didn’t really know if I’d be able to do it. But I took my chances anyway.
It was risky because my mental & physical health had deteriorated so much that I was told I was dying.
But enlisting in an eating disorder treatment centre was also risky because public health institutions trigger a lot of anxiety for me since my mom’s passing & I didn’t know if being surrounded by other ED victims would be the best for me.
In the face of two risks, I chose one. I took the road less traveled. I was tested tons of times along that road. I’m still tested until today, but every test taught me something about myself, made me stronger & helped me grow.
I think that because I was so weak physically & mentally, a part of me subconsciously wanted to prove myself & show that I was able to do it on my own.
And today I can say with pride that I chose to be my own hero.
People will tell you you’re sick over & over again.
They’ll tell you that you need to get help.
They’ll tell you that they’re worried about you.
While that support is SO NECESSARY, it’s not what will make you have the epiphany or realization & it’s not what will make you recover.
The only thing that will? YOUR WILL TO TAKE IT INTO YOUR OWN HANDS. You have to want recovery for yourself & you have to be willing to do anything & everything to attain it. You have to be your OWN warrior.
If you can take just ONE thing from me sharing my experience with you, it’s to TAKE THE LEAP OF FAITH. TAKE THE RISK. No matter how scary it is.
Believe in yourself & do it. It will challenge you in SO MANY WAYS, but it will make you stronger than ever, teach you so much about yourself & show you that it’s true: YOU CAN DO ANYTHING & EVERYTHING YOU SET YOUR MIND TO SO LONG AS YOU HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF & TRUST THE PROCESS.