Sometimes, the answer to feeling better, to making things right & to overcoming adversity is to look EVERYTHING you’ve been avoiding straight in the eye & face it. Easier said than done, I know.
Take it from me, the girl who repressed every trauma, every experience that made her feel imperfect, every feeling she didn’t like, everything she didn’t want to accept… Repression is THE WORST possible thing you can do for yourself, but I get it, it’s also the easiest.
As human beings, we have an innate tendency to avoid the things we can’t change, to internalize grief instead of grieving, to pretend our fears don’t exist instead of facing them, to run away instead of dealing with confrontation & to stay comfortable to avoid heartbreak.
But what if I told you that while avoidance may provide short-term form satisfaction or gratification, a quick fix or what seems like “the solution” to all your problems, IT IS NOT. At least not in the long run.
I lived a life of repression because I believed facing my fears, confronting my mental illness, accepting the end of my marriage, grieving my mom’s passing & recognizing that certain things will inevitably always be out of my control, made me vulnerable & meant I could no longer uphold an ideal of perfectionism.
But… PERFECTIONISM WILL BREAK YOU. I repressed it all until my breaking point & my breaking point almost killed me.
Upholding an ideal of perfection isn’t worth it. NOTHING IS WORTH MORE THAN YOUR HEALTH, both mental & physical. NOTHING IS WORTH MORE THAN YOUR SANITY. All the repression took that away from me: I lost control over my mind & thoughts & in turn, I lost control over my body & my being.
Next time something hits you & you just can’t shake it, look it in the eye & say “NOT TODAY”. You’re stronger, bigger, better, wiser & more worthy than a breakup, bad grade, problem at work, anxiety attack, setback, lost opportunity or failed exam.
Don’t let it define you, control you or take over your life.
Define it. Control it. Take over it & know that doing that will shape you, help you grow & realize just how strong you are.