Let’s talk about how your food fears & anxieties will eventually go away.
How am I so sure?
Because mine did.
Every morning, I show a photo of me about to or in the process of devouring my breakfast. I do it because it’s fun, but also because it’s a way to show how crucial consistency & routine is, how important it is to get in a good breakfast & how beautiful recovery is.
What’s crazy is that back in February, when I first started recovery, I did the same thing. I took pictures of myself eating or of my food but for different reasons.
One of the commitments I took when given the opportunity to recover in the comfort of my own home was to send my dad those pictures to give him reassurance that I was following my meal plan & eating. The pictures were a way for him to find comfort in knowing that I was on the right path & a way to hold myself accountable.
I won’t lie, taking those photos & seeing myself eat, let alone, the act of eating itself, were terrifying & triggered feelings of anxiety, fear & depression.
- Sometimes, I cried while eating.
- Sometimes, it took me 45 minutes to eat a bowl of yogurt or oats because every bite was harder than the last.
It was a constant battle between wanting & knowing I had to restore my weight & being triggered by my eating disorder.
It was really damn hard.
BUT: Look where I am today – posting photos of me eating breakfast on social media, but no longer to prove anything or reassure anyone.
Whether you’re struggling with an eating disorder or not, in recovery, or going through hardship or one of life’s many challenges, I do it to show you that real recovery from anything truly is POSSIBLE & it’s the best feeling in the world.
These pictures are more than just a girl eating her breakfast.
They’re the depiction that I’m no longer afraid of calories, fat, carbs or food in general.
I no longer have “safe foods”.
I don’t measure or count calories.
I don’t get anxiety when I look at my big bowls of yogurt or oats.
On the contrary, I get excited about them & I LOVE FOOD.
You can & you will get over your fears.
You can & you will recover.
You can & you will regain your life.
You will learn to love it (& food) again.
Life is beautiful.
You deserve to see the beauty.