Transformation: Accepting & Embracing The Cards You’ve Been Dealt & Playing Them Until You Find Your Happy Place!
“Unfortunately, in life, we don’t have a right to the cards we believe we should’ve been dealt.
We have an obligation to play the hell out of the cards we are holding”.
Sure, we can wonder why & wish we hadn’t been faced with difficult situations & obstacles.
But ultimately, wondering & wishing means one thing & one thing only: That things remain the same.
When I look at this photo, the one word that instantly comes to mind is TRANSFORMATION.
Some may look at it & think: weight gain.
Others may look at it & think: vanity.
I look at it & I see transformation.
But the transformation that I see is a lot more than just a physical one. It’s a complete 360-transformation on all levels, all scopes & in all aspects of my life.
It’s a transformation, socially, mentally, emotionally, intellectually & yes, ALSO physically.
You see, the thing about transformation is that it doesn’t mean that you must stop being you.
On the contrary, it demands that you FIND YOUR WAY BACK TO THE AUTHENTICITY & STRENGTH THAT IS ALREADY BEAMING INSIDE OF YOU.
You have to LET YOURSELF bloom & flourish.
For me, it was about telling myself a different story than the one ED had ingrained in my mind. The one that had made me so afraid.
I chose to tell myself that I was strong.
I was brave.
That nothing could vanquish or destroy me.
Insisting on this story was a form of mind work & control, BUT, it worked & it brought me to where I am today.
Every time I felt negative thoughts or emotions coming on.
Every time ED tapped me so delicately on the shoulder to come cohere my imagination.
I pushed it ALL away.
I made it my all-time mission to not let myself become afraid.
Fear brings about fear. Power brings about power.
I willed myself to BRING ABOUT power & I realized that this power, strength & will that I’d been searching for as I was on the path of destruction that ED had paved out for me, WAS ALWAYS ROOTED DEEP IN MY SOUL.
I simply needed to LET IT COME OUT.
I needed to WANT IT.
I needed to LET MYSELF TRANSFORM.
Once I did?
It wasn’t long before I actually was no longer afraid.
So, yes, I may look REMARKABLY different & a lot healthier than I did months ago.
BUT THAT’S NOT WHAT THIS PHOTO, RECOVERY OR MY TRANSFORMATION IS ALL ABOUT.
My transformation is about accepting the HORRIBLE cards I was dealt & not only accepting, BUT EMBRACING THEM, PLAYING EVERY SINGLE ONE until I got to a happy place, where the little flower inside of me that had wilted & nearly died, THE PERSON I HAD ALWAYS BEEN & WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO BECOME, suddenly started to bloom again.