Cheers to the freakin’ weekend & TO ALL YOU FELLOW CANADIAN MUNCHKINS, CHEERS NOT ONLY TO THE WEEKEND BUT TO THE FREAKIN’ LONG WEEKEND!
Oh!! & Happy Canada Day, eh?
OKAY, I’M DONE WITH BEING PATRIOTIC STAT.
NOW, you know how we all give ourselves the freedom of cheating on the weekend… AND BY CHEATING, I MEAN WITH FOOD (Don’t get any ideas, my loves!!!).
Well… what if I told you that this weekend, you could cheat, BUT NOT ACTUALLY “CHEAT”… or well, THAT YOU COULD EXTRA-CHEAT with your burger & that you won’t have to feel guilty about your fries!!! LET ME EXPLAIN.
OK but wait, before I explain…
DO YOU KNOW ANYBODY IN THE WORLD WHO DOESN’T LOVE FRENCH FRIES in every shape, size & form & who loses ALL CONTROL when they are in their presence (Yes, even if they are generally individuals with like THE MOST SELF-CONTROL IN THE WORLD)?
I mean… if you do, PLEASE INTRODUCE ME TO SAID PERSON SO I CAN INQUIRE AS TO HOW & WHY HE OR SHE IS THAT INSANE.
No, but in all seriousness, WE ALL
LOVE (ADORE & OBSESS OVER!) A GOOD FREAKIN’ BATCH OF HOMEMADE (OR TAKE-OUT, let’s be honest!) salty, crisp & crunchy, PERFECTLY-DEEP-FRIED FRIES, right?
But… the problem with that is that we ALL go through that POST-FRENCH-FRIES DEVOURING SESH MOMENT where we will do absolutely anything in the world to
1) UNZIP OUR PANTS &/OR BRAS so we could actually SOMEHOW BREATHE!
2) PUT ON THEM FAT PANTS & CUDDLE ON THE COUCH WITH NETFLIX & PERHAPS SOME CARAMEL & SEA SALT POPCORN (I mean, might as well at this point, right?!).
ANYWHO, I think I should really stop ranting at this point. THE POINT OF MY RANT? EVERYBODY LOVES FREAKING FRENCH FRIES.
And so, in the spirit of satisfying you munchkins & GIVING YOU & YOUR TUMMIES ALL THAT LOVE, let me talk to you about the SITCH IN MAH KITCH yesterday afternoon!
I’m talking… wait for it… drumroll please… ADMIT YOU ARE ON THE EDGE OF YOUR CHAIR STAT (Or, if you’re walking, admit you like stopped & paused for a second & got dirty looks from like every person who walked by you & almost ran into you, LITERALLY!!).
WHERE WAS I?…. Oh yes. I’m talking…
HEALTHY AF VEGAN, GLUTEN-FREE, REFINED SUGAR FREE & GUILT-FREE ZUCCHINI FRIES!
My loves, show me a recipe for zucchini fries (OR ANY FRIES FOR THAT MATTER) that is cleaner than this one & I will pay you LEGIT 1 MILLION DOLLARS. Challenge accepted, anyone? No, but honestly, it’s really truly impossible.
Ladies & gents, I present you with Kelly’s Vegan, Gluten-Free & Refined Sugar-Free Crispy, Crunchy, Delicious Zucchini Fries a.k.a. What-Are-French-Fries-Anyway?
These babes are EVERYTHING FROM:
Contain almost NO SODIUM!
Free of added-salt!
HEAVENLY SMELLING! (A.K.A. The sitch in your kitch is going to be VERY HARD TO HANDLE, MY LOVES. Like… you’re going to be SO TEMPTED to freaking open your oven & eat the babes right off the baking sheet, YES, EVEN MID-BAKE. But TRY TO RESIST! I mean… you do want to have a lil’ something leftover to devour when the babes are ACTUALLY ready, right?!)
DIPPABLE IN JUST ABOUT ANYTHING YOU WOULD DIP YOUR REAL FRIES IN!
MADE WITH VERY FEW GOOD-AS-EFF-FOR-YOU INGREDIENTS!
Oh, btw, the ingredients?
Brown rice flour BREADCRUMBS (which by the way, are wheat-free, gluten-free, made from 100% brown rice & contain zero sodium, MSG, sugar or cholesterol!)
Nutritional yeast (or PARM or ROMANO!)
COCONUT OIL COOKING SPRAY <3
& YEP, that’s all.
OH & of course, ZUCCHINI! But I mean… I thought that was a given.
& speaking of zucchini, I feel a little rant coming on… sorry not sorry! I PROMISE I’LL BE QUICK! Zucchini packs loads upon loads of HEALTH BENEFITS, but I’ll only speak to you munchkins about a few!
ZUCCHINI IS HEART-HEALTHY! In fact, this beauty contains high amounts of POTASSIUM & MAGNESIUM, which helps reduce & maintain normal blood pressure, as well as, some FOLATE, which helps break down certain amino-acids that can lead to heart attack and/or strokes.
ZUCCHINI IS LOADED WITH FIBRE & can therefore help burn fat in the bod!
ZUCCHINI HELPS KEEP THE BOD HYDRATED (In fact, it is 95% water!), which in turn contributes to increased energy levels!
ZUCCHINI HELPS IMPROVE EYE HEALTH! In fact, zucchini’s vitamin A content helps in active cell development in the eyes, which enhances vision & helps prevent age-related medical conditions affecting the eyes, such as macular degeneration!
ZUCCHINI IS A GREAT SOURCE OF VITAMIN C, which makes it an amazing food for fighting respiratory problems, such as asthma & also means that it packs LOADS OF ANTIOXIDANTS, which help keep our immune system healthy & contribute to ridding the bod of toxins!
ZUCCHINI IS ALSO AN ANTI-INFLAMMATORY!
ZUCCHINI CONTAINS CALCIUM, which helps the nervous system function properly & provides strength to our bones & teeth!
& LAST BUT NOT LEAST, ZUCCHINI LOWERS CHOLESTEROL! This is also due in large part to its high-fibre content!
KAY I’M DONE! Finally… (I know!) READY TO SHARE THE RECIPE FOR THESE BABIES WITH YOU MUNCHKINS. Admit you’re excited!!! LIKE BURSTING WITH EXCITEMENT, RIGHT?
My loves, YOU WILL NEED:
- 2-3 zucchini, CUT INTO 3-INCH STICKS;
- 2 egg whites;
- ½ cup of unsweetened almond or cashew milk;
- ½ cup of nutritional yeast (or Parmesan or Romano!)
- ½ cup of brown rice wheat-free & gluten-free breadcrumbs;
- ½ tsp. of garlic powder;
- Coconut oil cooking spray!
And now, since you’re so freaking impatient (I know, I would be too with all this deliciousness, TRUST ME!!!), LET’S TALK ABOUT HOW TO WHIP THESE BABIES UP, I MEAN, THAT HOW-TO?
- Preheat your oven to 425F & line two baking sheets with parchment paper!
- Cut your zucchini into 3-inch sticks (LEAVE THE SKIN ON!);
- In a SMALL (but shallow) bowl, whisk together the 2 egg whites & the almond/cashew/milk!
- In ANOTHER SMALL (but shallow) bowl (Sorry not sorry – TWO BOWLS IS NOT THAT MUCH!), combine the nutritional yeast (or REAL DEAL CHEESE) & the breadcrumbs! THEN, SPRINKLE SOME GARLIC POWDER!
- NOW, dip your zucchini sticks into the egg mixture & then ROLL THE BABES in the breadcrumb mixture!
- Coat your baking sheet with some cooking spray & place the zucchini sticks individually on the tray, WITHOUT PILING THEM!
- Before putting the babes in the oven, give them a couple spritzers (NO, NOT ALCOHOL!) of coconut oil cooking spray & BAKE THEM FOR 30-35 MINUTES, until golden brown & CRISPY-AF!
- & NOW… DEVOUR (WHATEVER IS LEFT, of course, since I have no doubt that you opened your oven like at least 3 or 4 times “just to taste one to make sure they were doing okay”, LAWLZ, all good, I used the exact same FREAKING EXCUSE!!! #sorrynotsorry!).
OH, but of course… FOOD PORN!!
ENJOY MY LOVES! <3 XOXO!