Clean-ish & Healthy-ish Indulgent Honey Caramel Graham Crumb Muffins a.k.a. Kelly’s-Diversion-Off-That-Clean-Eating-Bandwagon-Oh-But-These-Babes-Will-Blow-Your-Mind-&-Turn-You-Into-The-Muffin-Monster-&-Who’s-Counting-Right?!
Hi lovies!!! <3 <3 <3
Rise & shine AND Happy Monday! Y’all already know how I feel about Sunday nights & Monday mornings. PAS DOWN. But, but, but, that’s totally why I ALWAYS make my best efforts to whip up something beautiful in the kitch to BRIGHTEN MY MONDAY & GIVE MYSELF (& YOU MUNCHKINS, of course) A PERFECT (& VERY YUMMY) START TO THE WEEK. AND SO…
CURRENT SITCH IN MY KITCH (Checking in at 6:04am, WADDUP?): HONEY CARAMEL GRAHAM CRUMB MUFFINS IN THE WORKS. Holy eff. I just died. Guys, guys, I cannot breathe. MY KITCHEN SMELLS LIKE CARAMEL HEAVEN. SOMEONE PLEASE COME OVER & HELP ME UP. I fainted & I need an ambulance STAT.
My loves, this time around, I was considerate enough not to tease you too much. HONESTLY, I COULDN’T & I repeat, I COULDN’T afford to tease you too much Well, rather, you COULDN’T afford it, unless you wanted to faint, as well?
Basically, before I get into the nitty-gritty of these munchkins, all I can say is, THINK: Loads of beautiful graham cracker crumbs. SUGAR FOR DAYS. Raw organic honey. LOADS OF GLUTEN-FREE CARAMEL CHUNKS. Pure organic vanilla extract. CINNNNNNAMON SPICE. & some other ingredients that make these babies come together.
Ladies & gents, I present you with my Clean-ish & Healthy-ish Indulgent Honey Caramel Graham Crumb Muffins a.k.a. Kelly’s-Diversion-Off-That-Clean-Eating-Bandwagon-Oh-But-These-Babes-Will-Blow-Your-Mind-&-Turn-You-Into-The-Muffin-Monster-&-Who’s-Counting-Right?!
OH, & MY DISCLAIMER FOR THIS BABE OF A RECIPE: My loves, this is defs. NOT MY HEALTHIEST recipe, but HEY, WE’RE ALLOWED TO INDULGE EVERY NOW & THEN, RIGHT? AND TODAY IS ONE OF THOSE DAYS FOR MOI! I hope you munchkins aren’t mad at me for diverting off ‘dat clean-eating/healthy bandwagon JUST THIS ONCE (You’ll see they’re NOT THAT “unhealthy” – they’re still clean-ish & healthy-ish – they’re just slightly FUNNER, YUMMIER, HEARTIER, DELICIOUS-ER, CARAMEL-IER, LESS GUILT-FREE-ER & SWEEETER than the usual, BUT HEY… what do we say? IT’S ALL ABOUT NOURISHING THAT BOD. SO GO, GO, GO!!!!!!
LAWLZ, I crack myself up man. I’m telling you to GO, GO, GO… but did I even tell you munchkins what you need? NAH. Did I tell you how to go about “GOING”? NAH. Am I insane? YEP. It’s the muffins, I swear. They’ve not only rendered me speechless, but also loosened a couple screws in that little brain of mine. THEY’RE JUST MIND-BLOWING. WOAH.
My loves, YOU WILL NEED:
- 2 ½ cups of graham crackers, FINELY CRUSHED (My loves, you have two alternatives here:
- 1) THE LAZY SOLUTION: Buy the graham crumbs already CRUSHED, sold in most supermarkets in the baking aisle OR:
- 2) GO HAM. HAVE FUN WITH THIS. Buy the graham cookies whole & CRUMBLE THE EFF OUT OF ‘EM ON YOUR OWN!
- ¼ cup of granulated sugar (I told you munchkins, these babies are sweeter & slightly less healthy/clean than my usual recipes, SO PLEASE, DON’T SKIMP ON THE SUGAR. LET YOURSELVES INDULGE. Your bodies deserve it. NOURISH. NOURISH. NOURISH!);
- 2 tsp. of organic non-GMO baking powder;
- 1 cup of almond or another plant-based milk OR regular milk;
- 1 egg, BEATEN (MAKE SURE YOU BEAT ‘DAT EGG before you put it in the bowl, lovies!!);
- 2 tbsp. of raw organic honey;
- 12 gluten-free caramel candies, CHOPPED INTO CUTE LITTLE BABY CARAMEL CHUNKS;
- 1 tsp. of pure organic vanilla extract;
- ¼ tsp. of cinnamon (or nutmeg, if you prefer!);
Okay, lovies, I did tell you that these muffins were CLEAN-ISH & HEALTHY-ISH, right? I mean, as you can see, I still used all my raw, organic & natural ingredients… & well, THEY CONTAIN NO FLOUR, so that’s always fun, right?
THEY’RE ALSO GLUTEN-FREE.
Hmm… what else? THEY’RE FREAKING DELISH-AF. I mean, are you munchkins really worried about indulging just once? IF YOU ARE, HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM. You’re allowed. If you don’t grant yourself said permission, I GIVE IT TO YOU. I HAND IT TO YOU ON A SILVER PLATTER, FILLED WITH TWELVE OF THESE BEAUTIES. Are you really going to be able to resist anyways? Let’s be honest. Guys… just think of the combination of that graham crumble, with sticky-sweet-raw honey, scrumptiously beautiful caramel candy chunks, smooth & naturally sweet vanilla, a little cinnamon spice… SHOULD I KEEP GOING?
I really do genuinely believe I’ve convinced you by now & if I haven’t, well your diet is WAY TOO STRICT & UNHEALTHY (You’re probs thinking, well who is she to talk, right? The recovering anorexic… YES, MY LOVES, KEYWORD: “RECOVERING”). ANYWHO, PLEASE, DO YOURSELVES A FAVOUR, BAKE THESE UP, SERVE ‘EM TO YOUR FAM & FRIENDS. EAT ONE. OR TWO. OR THREE. LIVE YOUR LIFE. ENJOY LIFE & MOST OF ALL, NOURISH YOUR BODY & GIVE IT WHAT IT DESERVES & MOST OF ALL, WHAT IT CRAVES! (& I CAN GUARANTEE YOU that it’s craving these babies right about NOW!).
OKAY, now, as if the ingredients weren’t enough to have you munchkins running around in circles & going cray-cray at the thought of devouring these, LET ME EXPLAIN HOW SIMPLE, QUICK & EASY THEY ARE TO WHIP UP. I’m sure this will have you babies up off the couch IN NO TIME. STAT. PRONTO. Ya know? OKAY, here we go:
- Preheat your oven too 400F & line a muffin tin with some parchment cups!;
- If you bought the graham cookies whole like I did, CRUMBLE THE EFF OUT OF ‘EM!!! HAVE FUN WITH IT. CRUMBLE. CRUMBLE. CRUMBLE. & CRUSH! I won’t lie, my hands did kind of hurt a teensy-weensy bit, BUT AT THE SIGHT OF MY BEAUTIFUL GRAHAM CRUMBS, the pain was worthwhile. You know what they say, NO PAIN, NO GAIN (& I’m all about ‘dem gains, et toi?);
- MIX THE CRUMBS, SUGAR & BAKING POWDER in a LARGE bowl (Again, don’t screw yourselves over, my loves. START OUT WITH A LARGE BOWL. Don’t underestimate the power of a large mixing bowl when it comes to baking, especially with Kelly in the Kitch!!!);
- NOW, add ‘DA MILK, (BEATEN – reminder!!!) EGG & HONEY. Stir this wonderfulness into the batter until JUST MOISTENED;
- CHOP UP ‘DEM CARAMELS & fold them into the beautiful batter. MY LOVES, I’m warning you. You may need like 15 or 16 caramels BECAUSE YOU WILL END UP MUNCHING ON QUITE A FEW (What is your definition of a “few”?) OF ‘DEM IN THE PROCESS OF CHOPPING (Unless of course you have some sort of self-control going on… & if you do, PLEASE TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!);
- Once the caramels are folded into your batter, your batter smells like heavenly-caramel-perfection & YOU WANT TO LICK THE FREAKING BOWL, add in the vanilla extract & cinnamon/nutmeg & STIR ONCE MORE TO COMBINE ALL THIS SWEET & SPICY GORGEOUSNESS.
- NOW, ‘DAT MOMENT WE’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR… the moment where you fill those muffin cups. The moment where you watch your beauty of a batter plop into the muffin cups… & YOU DIE. But, please, try to stay alive. I need you to taste these!
- BAKE THE BABES FOR 15-18 MINUTES. I started out with 16 minutes & they were PERFECTION. As always, a toothpick should come out clean when entered into the center of one of your babies (oops, I mean MUFFINS. But you caught mah drift, right?) & the muffins should be LIGHTLY BROWNED.
- Let the babies stand for about five minutes (IF YOU HAVE THE FREAKING WILLPOWER NOT TO DEVOUR ‘EM RIGHT THE EFF AWAY!!!) & then remove them from the pan & either:
- 1) Transfer them to a cooling rack to cool off completely & then refrigerate the BABES in an airtight container for up to 1 week OR:
- 2) Serve right away warm-AF!!!!!
- Let’s be honest, who the eff has the self-control and willpower to look at these babes, smell these babes, crave these babes & then refrigerate them instead of GOBBLING THEM ALL UP LIKE THE MUFFIN MONSTER? (Just made that a thing by the way! #winning. I MAKE THINGS “THINGS”, KAY?).
- P.S. If you REALLY want to let yourselves indulge (And why wouldn’t you every now & then, right?), BEFORE DEVOURING THESE BABIES, top ‘em with some butter, nut butter, Nutella & drizzle ‘em with some ‘mo cinnamon or cocoa powder OR HONEY! NOW, DEVOUR!!!!!
OH, & OF COURSE… *DRUMROLL PLEASE*! FOOD PORN!!!!:
ENJOY BABIES!!! <3 <3 <3 xoxo!